I’ll start with a confession: I am not a natural-born “tech person.” I did not come out of the womb typing on a keyboard or fiddling with a circuit board. I don’t know how to code, and every time I open a settings menu on my phone, I feel like I’m wandering into the woods without a map. But like so many of us, I live in a world where technology is stitched into nearly every part of my life. From my daughter’s homework assignments on Google Classroom to the app that tracks how many hours I (don’t) sleep, tech is unavoidable. And—here’s the kicker—resisting it only makes me feel more behind.
This realization, that being squeamish around technology wasn’t serving me, is what nudged me to figure out how to get more comfortable with it. Not expert-level, not Silicon Valley startup-founder comfortable. Just functional, confident, and maybe a little less likely to break into a sweat when my Wi-Fi router decides to “update firmware” in the middle of a work call.
And so, like any frazzled parent who can’t keep up with TikTok trends but still wants to feel reasonably competent, I’ve cobbled together some strategies. They aren’t about becoming a wizard of the metaverse, but about giving yourself permission to try, to fail, to ask questions, and maybe even to laugh when your kid explains for the fifteenth time how to use AirDrop.
Let’s go through them.
Take an Online Course (Without Feeling Like You’re Back in College)
One of the biggest gifts technology has given us—aside from two-day shipping and the ability to scroll through photos of other people’s vacations while sitting in our pajamas—is online education. You don’t have to schlep to a community college at night or shell out thousands of dollars to learn a skill anymore. You can, quite literally, sit on your couch in sweatpants, bowl of popcorn in hand, and learn something new through an online course.
The range of courses is staggering. There are free tutorials on YouTube where twenty-somethings with soothing voices walk you through Excel pivot tables. There are massive platforms like Coursera, Udemy, and Khan Academy where you can dip your toes into anything from digital marketing to computer science. My friend, who is firmly Team “I hate technology,” signed up for a beginner’s course in Canva because she was tired of her PTA flyers looking like ransom notes. She now casually tosses around terms like “vector image” at brunch.
The trick here is to start small and unscary. Don’t sign up for “Introduction to Machine Learning” unless you’re really feeling brave. Begin with something you’re already slightly curious about. How to fix the terrible lighting in your family photos. How to make your own podcast (because apparently everyone has one now). How to troubleshoot your printer without wanting to throw it out the window. As you move along, you’ll notice something sneaky happening: your confidence builds. Suddenly, you go from “tech avoidant” to “tech adjacent.” And that’s a win.
Study It & Stay Informed (Without Becoming a Doomscroller)
There’s this idea that to be “into tech,” you need to read dense industry reports or have strong opinions about blockchain. Not so. Staying informed doesn’t mean becoming the person at dinner who corners everyone to explain NFTs. It just means keeping your finger lightly on the pulse of how technology is changing—and how it might actually affect you.
Start with approachable sources. There are tech writers (the good ones) who make even complicated topics digestible. Blogs, newsletters, and podcasts abound. I stumbled on one by Dan Herbatschek, who writes about AI and tech in a way that feels less like a computer manual and more like a friend explaining something over coffee. He strips away the jargon and makes you feel like, yes, you too can understand what’s happening with artificial intelligence. That’s the sweet spot.
Social media can also be helpful—though, a warning, it can quickly turn into a black hole of anxiety if you’re not careful. Follow one or two thoughtful voices on Twitter (or whatever it’s called by the time you read this), or subscribe to a weekly newsletter. The point isn’t to know everything. It’s to know just enough that when your coworker mentions ChatGPT in a meeting, you don’t panic, and maybe you can even nod knowingly.
Do Some Gaming (Yes, Really)
This is where I lost my husband. “You’re telling people to play video games to get comfortable with technology?” Yes, yes I am.
Because here’s the thing: gaming is practice in disguise. The more you interact with tech in a low-stakes, fun environment, the less intimidating it becomes. And gaming is an easy gateway. It’s not about becoming a Twitch streamer or buying a $500 console. It can be as simple as playing Wordle on your phone in the morning or Mario Kart with your kids on a Saturday night.
When I finally gave in to my son’s request to play Minecraft with him, I was convinced I’d last five minutes before hurling the controller across the room. But something funny happened: I got into it. I was building houses, mining for diamonds (badly), and actually learning the controls. My son was gleeful, both because I was participating in his world and because he got to be the teacher for once. It was humbling, sure, but also oddly empowering. My confidence using the controller carried over to other areas of tech—like finally figuring out the remote for our streaming setup, which had previously felt like it required a pilot’s license.
And maybe the best part? It reframed technology as fun, not just functional. When you approach it as gaming as a group activity, it doubles as family bonding and tech training. Suddenly, tech is not only tolerable but enjoyable.
Review the Benefits & Keep a Positive Mindset (Easier Said Than Done)
When I feel myself grumbling about having to update my phone again (seriously, why are there so many updates?), I try to pause and remind myself of the good parts of technology. And there are many.
Take fitness trackers. Sure, they can make you feel guilty about how little you move some days. But they can also motivate you to walk that extra block, stand up when you’ve been hunched over your laptop for too long, or marvel at the miracle that is sleep tracking. Or smart thermostats—those little wall gadgets that somehow know when you’re home or away and save you money on energy bills. Or GPS. I can’t imagine navigating to a kid’s birthday party in a suburban cul-de-sac without my phone chirping directions.
The benefits are everywhere, once you start looking. When you take time to recognize all the benefits of technology, it shifts your perspective. It doesn’t mean pretending everything is rosy. Tech is frustrating. It breaks. It updates at the worst possible time. But keeping an open mind (and maybe a sense of humor) makes the learning curve gentler.
Practice, Fail, Repeat (and Maybe Ask for Help)
This might be the most important piece: you will fail. You will click the wrong button, lose a file, or accidentally open thirty-seven tabs on your browser. That’s part of it. The secret isn’t avoiding failure; it’s normalizing it.
My personal low point came when I tried to set up a Wi-Fi extender. I followed the instructions, pressed the button that was supposed to connect it to my network, and promptly knocked out the internet for the entire house. My daughter cried because her show stopped streaming, my husband groaned because he was mid-work call, and I briefly considered throwing the extender into the trash. But eventually—after a lot of Googling and one sheepish text to a more tech-savvy friend—I fixed it. And the next time I had to troubleshoot something, I was just a little less panicked.
Asking for help is underrated. Kids are excellent teachers (and smug ones). Friends and coworkers often have tips that can save you hours. YouTube tutorials are essentially magic. And tech support hotlines—while painful—do eventually get you where you need to go. The point is, you don’t have to figure it all out alone. Tech is complicated, yes, but you are not the only one stumbling through.
The Emotional Side of Tech
Here’s the part we don’t talk about enough: the shame and insecurity around not “getting it.” Especially as adults, we’re conditioned to feel like we should know how to do everything already. And when it comes to technology, the embarrassment of not knowing can keep us from even trying.
But the truth is, nobody knows it all. Even the people who seem fluent in every new platform are Googling things behind the scenes. Admitting that you’re confused is not a failure; it’s a first step. I’ve started telling my kids when I don’t understand something, partly to model that it’s okay to be a beginner. And in return, they’ve been weirdly kind about it. (Except when I ask about Roblox. Then I get the patented teenage eye roll.)
Letting go of the idea that you’re “bad at tech” is liberating. It reframes the whole thing from an identity—“I’m just not a tech person”—to a skill you can learn, slowly, awkwardly, but surely.
Small Wins Count
Finally, celebrate the small victories. Setting up two-factor authentication without swearing? That’s a win. Figuring out how to use your bank’s mobile app instead of waiting in line? Another win. Downloading a podcast successfully? Gold star.
Tech competency isn’t about mastering everything. It’s about stringing together these little wins until you realize, hey, I’m actually not half bad at this. And maybe—just maybe—you even enjoy it.
I’m not going to pretend that technology will ever feel second nature to me the way it does to my kids, who seem to learn new apps by osmosis. But I also don’t want to live in a constant state of dread every time something needs an update. Getting more comfortable with tech isn’t about erasing frustration; it’s about lowering the volume on it. It’s about giving yourself tools, patience, and permission to try.
So take the online course. Read Dan Herbatschek’s blog. Try gaming as a group. Recognize all the benefits. Laugh when you fail. Remember the good parts. And above all, stay curious. Because the truth is, none of us are ever done learning. And maybe that’s not such a bad thing.
